Our Evolutionary Mismatch - The Human Relationship with Technology

Our lives are arguably busier and more scheduled than ever before. My experience of the pace of society in a developed community is that it’s fast and full.  This has been enabled through advancements in technology; from the birth of industry through to the powerful computers we carry in our pockets. We are more connected and informed than ever and yet statistics concerning our mental health show a concerning picture of greatly increased illness.  Our wonderful brains have masterminded the most incredible inventions to aid and ease our existence, while our primitive bodies have evolved little since the times of our ancient ancestors, who lived very different lives.



In a time of immediacy and publicly broadcasted lives, we have high expectations of ourselves and others. We are social beings who were created to connect with others and form relationships, however there is a limit to this. Robin Dunbar carried out a study, referred to as ‘Dunbar’s Number’, that concluded there is a limit to the number of stable meaningful relationships we can commit to. We have the capacity for a close inner circle of 5 relationships and a maximum capacity of 150 relationships in our widest social circle.  Our online connections push this far beyond its limit.  We are able, and even expected, to maintain relationships no matter where we are in the world and even form connections with people we have never met in the flesh.  We can be reached and communicated with at any time of the day and night. We are over stretched.

Social networks

Our cognitive biases play a critical role in how we experience every interaction and form an opinion about the world around us. These biases are an unintentional shortcut in our thinking, whereby we simplify and filter information, often to benefit ourselves or reinforce our own point of view. Online broadcasts, social media, 24/7 news and the conversations that accompany these, play into our biases in a sensationalist way.  We may see technology as a benign and helpful tool, however many design decisions have been made to take advantage of our human vulnerabilities and blindspots, to keep us engaged and reliant upon what it offers us.  Comparing our lives to the filtered and curated lives on social media skews our perspective of what real life is like, for us all.



Our brains still operate off primal signals and responses.  In moments of stress our ancient brain believes we are in immediate physical danger and reacts accordingly with the release of ‘cortisol’ hormones to gear us up for fight or flight, in order to survive.  Similarly, when we experience something happy, joyful, fulfilling and rewarding, we get a little hit of ‘dopamine’ hormones.  Historically, this would have been through a real world experience or interaction - a hug from a loved one or seeing a friend, but now we can trigger little drips of dopamine through checking our phones and seeing that we have notifications.  A little red dot on an app icon is a hit in itself.  And this is addictive, because we love feeling that happy feeling. 

I read a great book called ‘How to Break Up With Your Phone: The 30 Day Plan to Take Back Your Life’ by Catherine Price. It’s a dramatic title and was an eye opening and challenging step through realising how dependent I was on my phone, followed by a gradual break-up plan to start to sever those unconscious bonds that had formed without me noticing.  It’s not our fault though, because the tech is designed to hook us in and keep us engaged.  It’s good for business! But isn’t it interesting to know that a lot of people working in the big tech companies such as Google and Facebook won’t allow their children to have access to social media?! Because they know how powerful the addiction is and how manipulative and intrusive these platforms are.  Many online interactions have been designed, honed and streamlined to take advantage of our biological make-up, knowing that humans crave connection, validation and reassurance, whilst also being prone to compare ourselves and our experiences to others and aspire for more. It can be toxic. The candid and exposing documentary ‘The Social Dilemma’ takes a bold step to expose these truths and, along with the Center for Humane Technology, is a necessary voice standing up against the gargantuan tech industry.



We have an obligation to honour our hardwiring and know that the pace and expectations of modern life in the developed world are more than we’re biologically programmed to cope with.  We need to take time to switch off, to not be accessible, to recharge and focus on the most meaningful and intimate relationships in our lives. This, however, puts the onus on us as individuals to be aware of our relationship with technology and have the willpower to want to make a change and step off the treadmill.  Can there be a happy middleground where technology can serve us at a healthy level, rather than ruling us?  For now the shift is slow, but people like Tristan Harris, Co-Founder of the Center for Humane Technology, have been making significant strides by speaking in congress and encouraging the tech giants to work together, set aside their race to the top, and consider the fallout of their money minded decisions in terms of human wellbeing.  Lifting the lid on the industry and revealing the dark truths is the start of urging and encouraging product owners and designers to take accountability for the powerful position they are in to influence society and affect future generations, and crucially put in place legislation and monitoring for the better. It’s been a closed and secretive world dominated by few, who have made all the decisions on behalf of the masses.  It is beyond time to redress that power dynamic.

Now We See You - Striving for Inclusive Language

Language really matters.  How we label something or refer to it, changes how we subconsciously think and feel about that thing.  Words have great power.  

And while labels and sayings can stick and be used without thought, it pays to take a moment to think about how well these serve us.

As a ‘User Experience’ designer, it’s a title and term that has increasingly caused me unease.  Referring to the real people who use the products I design as ‘users’ feels deeply impersonal.  I had it pointed out to me that the only other circumstance in which this is applied to humans is when referring to drug users.  Similarly, the term ‘Case Studies’ being used (in social work for instance) to refer to the study and examination of people, has the power to degrade a true lived experience down to clinical documentation. 

Somehow this language removes ‘us’ a step from ‘them’.

This has the ability to shift the balance of power and can negatively impact the empathy influencing decision making.



The University of Washington released a comprehensive ‘IT Inclusive Language Guide’ https://itconnect.uw.edu/guides-by-topic/identity-diversity-inclusion/inclusive-language-guide/  in association with UW-IT, which highlighted many commonplace phrases used in the technology industry, which on closer inspection, have racist, sexist, ableist and ageist connotations.

One critical item highlighted is the term ‘Master’ used in coding:

“The master-slave relationship in technology usually refers to a system where one — the master — controls or is at the top or head of other copies, processes or systems.”

While this terminology dates back over a decade in the tech world, the guide makes clear that referencing the master-slave dynamic is offensive given the slavery origins in human terms.  Using this phraseology makes light of the true experience of slavery. Having addressed this, there has been a movement among developers to replace the label ‘Master’ with ‘Main’.



The full list of terms is comprehensive and illuminating to read through.  How many of these terms are used widely without a second thought about the origins? And what unfair ideologies are being inadvertently affirmed in the process?



Making subtle yet significant shifts shows respect and is a positive intentional step towards including all.  When we remember that we are designing for real people, just like us, it brings more heart into the conversations. 

365 Days of Headspace

A Year of Daily Digital Meditation

In an act of desperation I downloaded a meditation app called Headspace so that I could try to find an escape from the hurry and restlessness of life as it is. A year later I had somehow managed to stick with it every day.

I don’t want this to come across as a bragging “haven’t I done well?!” piece, and I realise that it’s probably counterintuitive to reflect on a process that encourages the mind away from thought and into a state of present being …but I couldn’t help a little pondering about the ethics of an app claiming to boost wellbeing, whilst also encouraging you to engage daily with your device.

How’s it been?

Not easy. And no immediate miracle cure — but it doesn’t claim to be.

The overall premise, the overarching spiritual theme, is to gently focus on breathing — each in and out breath — being in touch with the body and physical sensations. In this state the attention is on the physical ‘now’ — an ever present just-so-ness that is always there but often clouded by thoughts and feelings. What inevitably happens, and happens a lot in my experience, is that my mind goes on a merry little wander around all manner of these misleading thoughts and feelings. A little jaunt via to-dos, work commitments, shopping lists, a train delay, the socks I’ve chosen to wear, the phone call I meant to make, that conversation I had yesterday, that conversation I had a month ago, that conversation I had a year ago, that conversation I never had etc etc. So I have to catch my mind, tap it gently on the shoulder, note that it’s thinking and return to focusing on my breathing. Until it sneaks off again, and I smile and tap it again and breath once more. Except it isn’t always easy to smile gently:

‘Why am I getting this wrong?’, ‘Why can’t I stop thinking for one second?’, ‘Am I getting this right now?’

And those are the sneaky thoughts that you also have to catch, because they’ll slip by unnoticed. Tsk tsk.

So it takes some perseverance and is frustrating. And then there’s a moment when you feel more in tune with your body and the thinking doesn’t happen so much, which is invigorating and calming all at once. Then the next time the thoughts creep back in. Oh well, each time with a clean slate. But that’s part of the lesson, if you want to think of it as education (and maybe I do), that you can pick yourself up and dust yourself down and try again, because you can always have another go. This is one of those things that I’m sure is pretty tricky to master (if ever there was an understatement), so I feel comforted that it’s something I can approach afresh each day and just sit with, knowing that I’m a mixed bag. Aiming to remove the judgement is a large factor — but at least nobody else is party to what’s going on — just me and the app.

I’m a sucker for a run streak

I didn’t realise quite how powerful the nudge to meditate each day would be, but I felt compelled to keep it going. Those short quiet moments of calm in the morning before I left for work, or on the commute, have become precious moments that sometimes help set enough of a tone to guide me through the start of the day. I really don’t want to miss out on that, when at times it’s felt like the only control I have.

This particular app is onto something here, because tracking the daily activity (and handing out timely rewards to be shared with others) has given me extra incentive when the last thing I wanted to do was spend some time with myself, and an entire run of 10 minute sessions felt high-jacked by my thoughts and emotions. But each day was a new one and I’d approach it hopefully, or at least neutrally.

I imagine that the run streak was a controversial feature, that might seem at odds with the non-judgemental message the app tries to drive home. Given that this is a technique that plays to human vulnerabilities, addiction and a desire to not fail, it takes some self-kindness to not feel shame or frustration when the streak is broken. This model of gamification crops up often in apps to encourage continued use, and has been flagged as a technique to be mindful of. In ‘The Power of Streaks’ Pete Brown shares his (and his daughter’s) experience of the intense lure of maintaining a streak and the pressure this brings. For some apps more than others this could feel as though it has wider social consequences and even an impact on mental health.

“The higher your streak number gets, the more valuable it becomes, and — logic would follow — the greater your dopamine reward.” (Pete Brown)

The ability to build habits from a regularly repeated action is what’s in question here, and whether it is in fact a habit we want to be encouraging.

The sanctity of the private moment

I notice it said with increasing frequency that modern life feels fast, hectic, distracting and overwhelming. In a world that relies more heavily on rapidly developing technologies and finds us ever bombarded by notifications and social broadcasts, it seems contradictory to have found moments of calm from an app. But then again I’m happier to advocate an app that encourages positive and enriching experiences and doesn’t profit from us falling prey to a rabbit hole of preoccupation and self-loathing (or at least inadequacy). I don’t think I’m alone in this thinking, with others commenting eloquently on the power held by technology and the need to consider the ethics that underpin the interactions we have each day with devices and their interfaces. As a designer myself, I’d highly recommend Sam Harris’ interview with Design Ethicist Tristan Harris‘What is technology doing to us?’, which delves more deeply into these thoughts, questioning and unpicking the ugly hidden motivations that lie behind many digital products.

My Headspace journey has taken me through guided meditations focusing on self-esteem, acceptance, stress, creativity, kindness, change, anger, focus and balance via exercises that consist of ‘noting’ and ‘visualisation’ techniques. Throughout the year I’ve seen the app grow to offer more categories of targeted meditation packs, mini one offs and a fresh new session each day, all voiced by Andy Puddicombe — a meditation and mindfulness expert. I can only imagine that each person experiences these in a personal and unique way. When I’m told to visualise ‘liquid sunlight’ pouring down from above my head, I can sometimes almost smell and taste its haze as I inhale and fill my lungs with what I imagine to be glowing golden particles. Other times it feels an impossible struggle to even cobble together the smallest spark of brightness. But it’s a moment that I want to hold onto and keep trying at.

If it isn’t hard it’s not worth doing

…so they say. And personally I have found the ritual of regular meditation to be a challenge in itself. Which makes it all the more bizarre that it was something I clung to during a challenging time, where I felt swamped by my day-to-day. What has been most enlightening is paying attention to how much thinking I do and realising how often my mind takes it upon itself to have a word with me, beat me up about something or make me question myself. Knowing this has, in a small way, allowed me to filter out some of my internal noise, which has been welcome when life so often feels like sensory overload. So even if meditation isn’t your thing, there’s a lot to be said for striving to find a moment where you can slow down enough to be more conscious of what your mind is up to. (And maybe also be aware of what you’re using your tech for, and whether it’s actually using you…)

Communicating with Prototypes

Encouraging multi-disciplinary collaboration through interaction

A picture is worth a thousand words, but an immersive experience cuts right to the core.

Let me share an ‘aha!’ moment with you, that taught me first hand how to think about effectively communicating design ideas to a non-design focused audience.

Tell a Story?

Working as a designer I often find myself trying to explain and justify my designs & decision making. There’s an art to storytelling and scene setting that I’m always trying to improve, attempting to bring people on a journey with me (quickly) so that we’re all on the same page to test out ideas, get feedback, iterate and improve. Setting the context, emotions, motivations, needs and the 5 W’s (who, what, why, where, when) are a good start.

Beyond that there’s the choice of language used depending on who I’m talking to; my flouncy design vocabulary doesn’t always translate when I feel like I’m being explicit in what I’m saying. A lasting memory of this in action comes in the form of a childhood game my family would often play (usually at Christmas with a huge tin of Quality Street at arm’s reach), where one person had to give step-by-step drawing instructions to the group. Everyone heard the same instructions, but the individual drawings were inevitably wildly different at the end. What we hear and how we understand it is deeply personal based on our perspective, our frame of reference and our life experiences.

“A box with two lines through the middle” — what’s your interpretation?

But not everybody has time for a fully blown tale that paints a beautiful picture of a vision. Arty mood boards, journeys and maps, post-its and personas aren’t top of everyone’s agenda.

Get Technical?

Working in an environment where technical diagrams are frequently created, my colleagues are familiar with more visual flows laid out with boxes, headings, arrows and notes. So, I had considered that to be a reasonable format for sharing work.

And here’s the moment I learned to question that assumption:

In the spirit of getting everyone involved and talking about a particular design idea I sent a nice big PDF of an app flow around internally to get some broad feedback from my colleagues.

No responses…

Obviously nobody had the time or inclination to pore through a lifeless screen flow, following arrows from one static screen & button to the next. It was unfair of me to expect that. To many people that particular format (one which I’m very familiar with) doesn’t mean an awful lot and isn’t immediately easy to make sense of.

Get Hands-On?

I reassessed, pulled the screens from the flow into inVision, put together a set of interactive prototypes and shared the links around.

Within seconds there was a simmering buzz of excitement and interest spreading through the office — people were testing the prototypes on their desktops, trying them on their phones, calling out their reactions and voicing their frustrations. From sales and marketing to devs, I was getting instant feedback. It was incredible!


In essence, give people something they can manipulate and control and play with and you’re much more likely to get engagement. By providing something tangible, anything, even if it’s not polished (preferably not polished actually, so that it feels like a work in progress not yet set in stone), you’ll encourage reactions.

I was able to see, hear and feel what was working and what wasn’t — it was valuable learning and felt empowering. My attention was drawn to areas that I could immediately work on in order to improve my initial efforts.

Of course there’s a time and place for storytelling, sketches, flows, journey maps etc. but you have to gauge your audience. So I’ll add my voice to the many who advocate sharing tactile experiences by prototyping early and quickly and getting them out there into people’s hands.

Feeling Vulnerable at Work

Coming to terms with feeling out of my depth

In those times when you make a career leap, change tack or take on a new challenge there’s a transition period. A time of settling, learning, proving yourself and growing. It’s not necessarily a comfortable place to be and I’ve certainly experienced that.

Reflecting on how I’ve felt this acutely I realised that there are some things worth holding in mind…

  • Listen to yourself

I have cycles or ‘seasons’ of productivity, which need to be followed by quieter periods of reflection and re-building. It’s a pattern that makes sense to me now, but is something that I’ve taken time to recognise in myself. I actively choose to give myself permission for downtime now, which goes against a tendency to keep going at full throttle until I physically can’t anymore.

  • Listen to others

People are fascinating. There are so many stories to hear, experiences to learn from and knowledge to glean from those around us. Make time for people and really engage in what they choose to share.

  • Ask questions

Ask and ask and ask until you get to the place that you want to get to. This one is hard for me, but I’m getting there. For fear of exposing myself as a fool or appearing stupid I’ve historically held back on posing questions, especially in a crowd. But in reality I’ve found that I’m usually not the only one who is in the dark wondering, so it’s better to just get it out. It’s okay to say “I don’t know that….but I’ll find it out”.

  • Learning from mistakes is hard but fast

All the articles, books, podcasts and seminars in the world can’t make up for your first hand experience. They’ll set you off in the right direction and arm you with tools, but you have to try, fail and succeed yourself.

  • Don’t worry about missing out

You don’t have to be signed up to every mailing list/group/meet ups/conference (etc etc etc…). Try some out, pick your favourites and take them in when you’re ready to digest the information they have to offer. It doesn’t have to become a never ending ‘to do’ list to stay on top of.

  • Take inspiration from everywhere

Keep your eyes open and notice what spurs you on and gets you excited. Use those things to inform what you do. The things that naturally speak to your core will be the most valuable to you.

  • Embrace what you don’t know

Knowing everything is impossible, you shouldn’t know everything, nobody expects you to know everything. But if something takes your interest then make some space for it if you have the capacity to. Or keep it in mind for when you can take it on board.

  • Remember that everybody is learning

It can be easy to think that others have got it all sorted and to draw unhelpful comparisons, but we’re all feeling our way through life. My experiences of going to conferences has often resulted in feeling inspired but also utterly deflated, as I’ve come away feeling like everyone has got it nailed and I’m doing everything wrong. But this is only half the story, and there’s always more that goes on behind the shiny scenes of a slick presentation or case study.

  • Be you — play to your skills and know where your vulnerabilities lie

Get to know yourself, notice what you do really well and give yourself credit for that. But be aware of what really challenges you and see if you can focus attention on strengthening those areas with a compassionate mindset.

  • Stretch your comfort zone

Do things that frighten you (even if only a little bit). Fear has a habit of kicking in when it’s not genuinely needed (for me anyway), when I’m not really in any physical danger. So do things that take a little bit of courage on your own scale. It can start small:

“Courage starts with showing up and letting ourselves be seen.” (Brené Brown, Daring Greatly)

  • Find some allies

Having people on ‘your side’ is a comfort at the very least. Whether it’s people to talk to, people who value what you do or people you enjoy collaborating with, these relationships help to affirm what we do and aid our growth. Reach out to people you meet, people online and take words from people who’ve been through similar experiences.

  • Give yourself time

Some things just take time. Gathering experience and knowledge takes time. You will improve, but that process can’t be fast forwarded, so enjoy it as it unfolds. This is an area where I’ve given myself the most grief. My ambitions have exceeded my ability and continue to do so.

Ira Glass has spoken eloquently about ‘The Gap’: a level of taste and a desire to create incredible work that can’t be achieved when you’re starting out. It feels frustrating, humiliating and disappointing, but you just have to ride it out, keep crafting, adapting and learning.

“It’s only by actually going through a volume of work that you’re going to catch up and close that gap, and the work you’re making will be as good as your ambitions.” (Ira Glass, The Gap)

Similarly Steve ‘Buzz’ Pearce talks about a scale of Impact in creative roles, where you simply have to go through the process of learning your craft and dabbling with invention before you’re able to start making an impact.

Steve 'Buzz' Pearce’s Impact Scale

Allow yourself that time, with all the enthusiasm you want, and things might just fall into place much quicker than you’d imagined. But don’t be disheartened if it’s taking a while to get more comfortable.

And that’ll be when you want to find your next challenge…